I am a blog slacker.

Work is kicking me around, and school is taking over what's left.  I spent like 2 weeks trying to give up caffeine but today I decided I have to sideline it until after our trade show.

Also my T-spine is a wreck from something this week.  When I finish this discussion forum I need to get on the foam roller.  And you know, do laundry, etc.

I am trying for a week of CFSA-nutrition-program strict this week before I have to move to the hotel for work next Sunday.  At the very least, I need 5 days.  I love working shows, but I know it will wreck havoc on my eating.

In other exciting news, I bought a new blender ball and my voodoo x bands came in.  I love/hate my ankles.  I love/hate my ankles....

In less than 2 weeks this show will be over.  In a month (+/- depending on how much ass-hauling I do) school will be over and I

Goals this week aren't all related to Crossfit.

1) Get caught up in my homeland security law class.  This means doing a short assignment every day this week.  Need to prioritize if I want to
2) Don't buy any more food.  Going to be at a hotel for 4 days = eat what you have.  Plan ahead and put a meal for the day I get back in the freezer.
3) Look at my rest days... I didn't take one last week because I wanted to test my max jerk but that ended up not behooving me as I was too fried from the max the day before to put up a solid effort.  However, I will have Monday the 8th and Tuesday the 9th off at work, which aren't "recovery" days but can be days off.  Might take the 10th off too.  I want to make sure I work hard enough going up to a few days off to do some real recovery, but I also don't want to blow myself out when I am teetering this line of stress and fatigue.
4) Back squat 200#.  This is ridiculous.  Just do it.

I'm going kicking and screaming back in to the homework cave.  Tomorrow is max clean testing again, which I've tanked at this month soooooooooooo I'll just take it as it comes.

13.3

I went to Misha's this morning for the first time.  Delicious.  And they have coconut milk.  I might go back and get some beans that I could use in my Keurig, but I'd need the reusable filter for that -- and I'm really, really trying to cut back on coffee, which I'm actually doing pretty well on.  It might make for a nice weekend routine, though.

I really went there with the intent of doing homework -- however, after securing my medium Route 66, I couldn't find a table.  So I did the reasonable thing and went to Crossfit.

I hemmed and hawed over retesting my 13.3.  My reasons for not wanting to involved: my lack of conditioning with wallballs (in fact, the last time I did wallballs was on New Year's Eve); and overriding, the reason that I haven't done wallballs - the wrist I injured during CAL that still isn't 100% and unhappy with impact.  But historically (historically being "the last 2 weeks") I have added reps on my second go-around, and more importantly, I was overly unhappy with my performance.

The gym for me isn't a place to get emotional.  It's a place where I can check everything that has been bothering me at the door and pour my energy in to the workout.  Sure, I get sentimental about the experience of Crossfit as a whole, but that's not where my mind is when I'm picking up the bar.  So it's really unsettling for me for a workout to get to me as much as 13.3 did.  I feel like it highlights everything I haven't accomplished.  Which I mean is kind of the point, these workouts are designed to expose our weaknesses. 

I'm used to pain, I'm used to fighting, I'm used to being uncomfortable.  I don't mind a workout freaking me out a little bit, and I think a few pre-competition panic tears can be healthy.  But I just can't let go the fact that I sucked so bad at this.  And yeah I added 10 reps today to Thursday's score, but in the end it's still pathetic.  I was crying WHILE I was doing wallballs today -- not just collapsing on the ground beating myself up after (which I did Thursday).  I let myself down.  Again.

It's over and I don't get another chance at this.  Ultimately it's a diagnostic.  Ultimately I'll come back to it.  Ultimately I messed up my wrist again and it's probably back down in the 80% range instead of the 95% I was pushing.  And ultimately I am still pissed and hell AND still have to do my homework.

Pre-SAS clean eating day-whatever-this-is side note: last night I went to Chipotle with a small handful of people after the WOD, and I didn't finish my burrito bowl.  The longer I eat paleo, the more I notice that I'm not just mindlessly putting away compliant food.  I am actually getting full and being able to listen to my body.  Go leptin.

Day 4? Lessons from Crossfit. Mobility. Etc.

My one-year Crossfit Anniversary
Today.

Crossfit is one of those things that came in to my life exactly when I needed it.  It was serendipitous, and through all the pain, sweat, tears, and blood, it has been lovely.  I wouldn't ask for it any other way.  Maybe I'll wax poetic about this a little more later on.
The Mobility Seminar
I promised my teammate Cynthia a blog on this and it hasn't happened yet.  I keep forgetting my notebook places and having to do stupid adult things like find my floor and clean the sink.  For now, we'll suffice it to say:

• After my 13.2 retest, I literally could not lay on the ground and raise my legs.
• 15-20 minutes of mobility a day, every day.  I'm a full-time communications specialist, half-time student, Crossfitter, Paleo afficianado, and part-time social media ninja, so I know it can be hard to fit this in.  But just do it.
• Foam rolling is useless :-( (lacrosse balls are more portable, anyway, but I have a feeling that piece of PVC will be my BFF after 13.3)
• I'm enamored with the VooDoo band.  I've been trying to do it at least twice a day on my ankle -- which I have been having issues with for, oh, 15 years.  And other body parts.  It hurts and then it feels good.  Bizarre.
• Prioritize the spine.  Protect your back first and foremost.  It was really hard listening to talk about how central nervous system injury sucks and will mess you up while I was shifting around in my chair after seriously messing up my back during fast, light deadlifts.  Midline stability > everything else.

I'm also playing with pistols now.  I think it's more mobility in my ankles than I realized than strength -- I have fine mobility through a regular squat because I have awesome hip flexors (according to my massage therapist).

I'll touch back on this more.  But if you have the opportunity to go to this seminar, you should.  And also sit in the front row, it's more fun that way :)

Day 4 (/21)
New favorite breakfast: scramble some eggs in Southwest Ranch Tessemae's, throw on a mix of baby spinach and arugula, top with guacamole.  I've done eggs to death but they're do-able this way.

I'm eating less fat but I find this means I'm snacking more.  I guess it's a trade-off.  I'm going for a pedicure on my lunch and going to hit up Sweet Green afterwards.

Day 1. Again.

Welcome to Day 1. 

Some carrots, mushrooms, and 2 boneless chicken thighs I baked in paprika and lemon Tessemae's for breakfast.  Another one of the goals I've been working on is to drastically reduce my caffeine consumption, so though I want/need it this morning, I limited myself to a half black/half passion grande iced tea from Starbucks.  No food pictures.  Ever, preferably.

Well, maybe if I make soup...

This again...?

I just got back from getting ice cream -- well, frozen custard -- with Christina at the Dairy Godmother in Del Ray.  This is at least the 4th time in the last 8 days that I've consumed some form of overly sugared-up dessert product.  And holy shit, am I feeling it.  I have a slight persistent headache, I don't sleep well, I am TIRED, I'm bloated, I'm not recovering as fast, my joints don't feel good... overall I just don't.  feel.  good.

Since my Whole60 ended last Saturday, I have done incredibly rude things to my body while still demanding excellence of performance out of it.  I asked for performance both mentally: Level 1 (which I passed) and Mobility and Movement certification in 8 days with 5 days of day job in the middle, and physically: hello, 13.2 on Thursday and Friday, and I got it, but as I sit in my couch in lulu, I have nothing left to give.  This is, for the record, NOT the way you are supposed to come off a nutrition program.  I didn't need to do the tenative, gentle off-ramping because I did that last time and know how foods effect me.  But I went a little nuts because I knew that come Monday (aka, tomorrow) I would be going back on a strict eating challenge with another small group from my gym.

My participation came with a caveat that I'm going to refer to as both an experiment and exercise for me.  I will be eating clean from March 18 until the evening of April 7.  From there, I will proceed to take a stab at gluten-free eating while I spend 3 full days living, sleeping, breathing a work conference in National Harbor.  When I am able to pack up my car at the end of the show on April 10 and drive back in to Virginia, I will be back to compliance for the last 8 days.  I think this is going to be really good for me, actually: to be realistic with my expectations for those 3 days at the Gaylord, buffered by 3 weeks of compliant eating before and a guaranteed week after.

Speaking of realistic expectations, I have two frameworks going in to this next stretch of clean eating.

1. Consistently max it out in the gym.  This means doing everything I can to support optimum performance when I am in the box, including sleep, days off, pre- and post-workout nutrition (and supplementation).  I am going to add in two days a week of running in preparation for a 5k I am doing in May, so I need to figure out how to cycle that in as well.
2. Portion control.  I have spent the last 4 months eating clean but without a lot of regard for portions -- half a chicken and two avocados?  SOUNDS GOOD!  I am going to use the Whole30 meal template as a start -- palm size portion of protein and dialing back on my fat consumption.  It is my plan to do this for the first week, and then reevaluate my hunger levels and see if I need to adjust from there.  Eating compliant food in non-compliant portions was only going to work for so long, unfortunately, and I am not quite halfway to my body composition goals.

As a personal challenge, I would like to try experimenting with at least one, hopefully two, new recipes every week.  It is easy to get complacent in the kitchen (or in the Good Stuff/Chipotle lines), but I know there is more delicious paleo food out there.  I'm thinking about trying to make a clean kung pao chicken.  I'm hoping to blog my kitchen adventures, but only the good ones, not every bite that goes in to my mouth.  This is about making this lifestyle fun and sustainable, not falling face-first in to a box of Samoas.

I've toyed with leaving the scale in the closet this month too.  Jury is still out on that one, and the scale is still chillin' with the Samoas.  In the closet.

Pre-program investment.  Doing the things that allow you to change your life can be freaking scary.  Do them anyway.

"This or That"

Cheese: cool.

Ice cream: boo. (This is nothing I didn't know)

Pink berry fro yo: fine.

Fireworks gluten-free pizza: thumbs down.

Sigh. The intolerance to the gluten-free crust is new. It makes me very hesitant to even try gluten.

Gluten: I've had pie crust with gluten in it (it was delicious) but my right arm/shoulder pain flared up within an hour. I've had joint pain from gluten before - yeah, this stuff is nasty.

The pie and ice cream made me sleepy and grossly full, but nothing adverse otherwise. I'm ok - but I'm not *happy*. Right now feels much more lie survival than thriving.

Still tapering down the caffiene as well in prep for next week (and sea air space). I want and need consistent energy levels without chemicals. This has me knocked on my ass as well. One cup a day. A second cup in the afternoon on days I train twice.

Five things everybody can take from an L1

"What did you do this weekend?" My coworker asked as I was waiting for my much-needed coffee at Dunkin Donuts this morning.  (I'm trying to cut back.  Really.  Says she who slammed a large iced coffee both days this weekend.)

Anyway, I kind of laughed.

"I was in Reston all day Saturday and Sunday in training for this Crossfit certification."

True life, I spent about 16 hours this weekend learning, listening, laughing, and yes, working out, with ~60 other athletes (and potential Crossfit trainers).  Two of them were friends from the gym, which made the experience more fun and engaging, and last from the moment we set out in the morning to when we pulled back in to the CFSA parking lot at 6 p.m.  I lost "my weekend", but I gained a whole lot more.

Highlights of the weekend included Mike G, who was the "head" of our seminar and de facto emcee, psyching everybody out about doing Fran at 9 am on the first day; actually doing Fran on the first day with 40 other athletes cheering you on (PR!); watching our seminar staff do 13.1; the monk running by (twice) while we were practicing snatch technique with PVC; and playing with the muscle-up progression (and learning you do not have to be close to having a muscle-up to do this).

This experience will undoubtedly have dramatic, lasting effects on my performance as an athlete, competitor, and as a member of the CFSA community.  Pretty sure once you start developing a coach's eye you can't turn that off.  That said, it's not on every athlete's agenda to go for a Level 1 -- and I wanted to draw out and share a few points that everybody can learn from.

1) The very basic breakdown of what we do: Crossfit: constantly varied functional movement executed at a high intensity. 
I'm going to throw some words from my notes at you.  The movement we do is inherently safe because it is functional movement -- essential movement.  When you can't do things like squat or lift something overhead any more, you lose the ability to move independently.  Everybody can do Crossfit because it is based on the way we move and the things we need to do in every day life.

That said, just because it's inherently natural and safe does not mean that you don't need to BE safe -- a child bending down to pick up a toy off the ground is a natural movement; me throwing an additional 200 pounds on my shoulders then lowering myself to the ground requires a lot more thought and (developed) strength.  It improves those functional movements -- it makes me a better human -- but functional movements will not be safe if you're an idiot about them.  Educate yourself, listen to your trainer, train (and practice), and don't do stupid shit.  It'll be great.

2) PVC work is hard, and you can never do enough of it.
I've been Crossfitting for about a year, so you wouldn't think I would need any help on a freaking air squat, right?  Pretty sure I did those doing some Jillian Michaels workout DVD in high school.  I can bust those things out all day, my squat can't possibly have any immaturity!  Wrong.  And you hang out in a deadlift position or overhead squat for long enough, even with a PVC pipe, and things start to tingle and twitch and hurt.   More of us intermediate-ish athletes -- not new, not beginners, but not advanced or experienced (yeah, 1 year doesn't count me as "experienced) -- probably need it than we even know.  Don't be complacent.  Be actively working to perfect your movement, on your best lifts alongside your weakest.  It will never, ever hurt you as an athlete to take it back to basics and improve your motor patterns, adjust your positioning, work your range of motion.

3) You will naturally click with some coaches better than others.
All of our trainers were incredibly experienced and talented.  We would break up in to small groups to cover each movement and the progression of the 9 fundamental movements, as well as how to coach them (practicing on each other).  It was interesting to see the different coaching styles at play -- and there were many of them.  My favorite, if I had to pick, was Hollis.  He was a wealth of knowledge, but also had humor about it and knew how to explain and teach concepts clearly.  As an athlete, you will find coaches you do better with than others (CFSA has great coaches, and they all have something to teach you).  Just remember that a coach doesn't need to be that coach you "click" with to be able to learn from them.  But make the time and the effort to work with and reach out to those coaches that you do -- this experience is what you make it.

4) You can't out train your diet.
Training and diet will both move you towards wellness.  However, there is only so far they can take you independently.  I'm a big believer in Whole30, but the seminar talked a lot about Zone.  But you don't have to be paleo or zone to fuel your body properly as an athlete.  Nobody is going to be healthy eating freezer pizza and McDonald's.  Put clean, good stuff in and get results out.


5) Crossfit is, and is supposed to be, fun.
Whether you are laughing together, working out together, making jokes... it is about the Crossfit community.  It's not about seminar staff, it's not about me... it's about you!  Collectively.  CFSA has the best community, don't cheat yourself out of the experience.  I came back from a day of learning and Fran-ing on Saturday night and still took a shower and went out to celebrate Madi's birthday for a little bit.  Yeah, I was finishing a nutrition program and couldn't drink and that may have slightly made me want to punch somebody in the face, but it wasn't about having a bourbon - it was about being with friends.  And that's the greatest.  Share your passion with the people around you.

Bonus: Somebody asked about the switch grip, and this has come up in some CFSA programming guidance as well.  What we were told: don't switch your grip until you are deadlifting a weight that you never want to clean.  I thought that was really interesting.  I can currently pull around 225 on a deadlift, and though that feels insanely heavy to me, I remember that current American record holder for what will be my weight class clean and jerked 282.5.  Just some food for thought.

The Level 1 Course is great -- it really, really is.  A year later, it just reaffirms that Crossfit is what I love and where I am meant to be.  If you can find the means, you should do it.  You won't regret it for a second.  Part of me wonders what a community of athletes where everybody could go through that kind of intensive training and learning experience would be like.  Some would probably just call that initiation ;)

What's more important than going to a Level 1 is to continue to educate yourself.  It is easy to become complacent as an athlete -- my air squat is "pretty good", my front rack is "okay".  There are tons of free resources, or for an incredibly nominal fee ($25, which is probably half of what you spend on coffee on a monthly basis) the Crossfit Journal, that will teach you everything you need to know and more.  Heck, the Level 1 Training Guide is FREE.  Crowd source.  Community source.  There is something to learn around every corner, on every page, from every athlete if you are willing to look for it and ask for it.